Video Game Retrospective -- GoldenEye: Rogue Agent (2004), Part 1

  There are a ton of James Bond video games out there. There's 007 games for just about every console from the ZX Spectrum to the Wii U and I'm sure most fans of the Bond movies have tried at least one of the franchise's many interactive experiences. I've only played a handful – Agent Under Fire (2001), Everything or Nothing (2003), GoldenEye 007 (1997) – and to be honest I suck at most of them (the only one I've ever completed is AUF). But earlier this year I put myself through one 007 game that I just had to write about, 2004's GoldenEye: Rogue Agent.

  Although its title implies the game's based on the 1995 film GoldenEye, Rogue Agent is an entirely original creation. Taking place in an alternate universe, the plot follows a former MI6 agent who's turned evil and gotten a job with Auric Goldfinger of not-SPECTRE (remember, this was when the legal rights to the name SPECTRE were in dispute). Playing a Bond-style adventure as a villain instead of the familiar hero had a lot of potential. Just think of all the stuff an evil version of James Bond could get up to! This is going to be amazing, right?

  Let's go through the single player campaign together, shall we? The game begins with an introductory level at Fort Knox just like in Goldfinger, except you take on the roll of some agent dude partnered with Bond. You spend a minute getting acquainted with the controls, which this game maps out serviceably. Within moments your helicopter crashes and falls through a roof, crushing agent 007. Oops.

  It's in this beginning level you're introduced to the gunplay, so let's go over that for a moment. Unlike most 007 games of the era, Rogue Agent only allows you to carry two weapons instead of a full arsenal. Lame! There's a basic pistol you always have in reserve, but it thankfully disappears if you choose to dual wield two other weapons. That's right, you can dual wield in this game. This only goes for some weapons though; larger weapons like rocket launchers and assault rifles need both hands to operate them. Also, most of the guns don't allow you to zoom in. Ranged weapons are limited. You've got a limited assortment of weapons: 2 pistols, an assault rifle, an SMG, a grenade launcher/detonator, a rocket launcher, a lever-action shotgun, a slow-firing rail gun, and a poison/stun gun that slows people down. That's pretty much it. The only real escalation in firepower comes in the form of a minigun (in the 4^th or 5^th level) and the final level's OMEN rifle. More on that one later...

  As far as abilities go, you can't jump, but you can melee and you can also take enemies as human shields which is always good for a laugh. However, the dumb badguys can often be seen doing the same... to eachother.

  Anyways, you fight through Fort Knox to prevent a nuclear bomb from detonating and as soon as it looks like you're going to fight Oddjob, the bomb detonates and the level ends. But it's OK because it was just a simulation. M (voiced by Judi Dench herself) scolds the unnamed agent and dismisses him. The player is then treated to a rather cool opening “credits” scene setting up the plot. The agent gets a job with Goldfinger, Dr. No breaks away from not-SPECTRE and tries to take over the world on his own, a rivalry develops between Goldfinger and Dr. No, the doctor shoots the agent in the eye, and Francisco Scaramanga, not-SPECTRE's tech specialist (voiced by Christopher Lee himself), implants a cybernetic eye of gold in the vengeful agent's head thus giving him the moniker “GoldenEye”. Uh hum. This eye gives the player special abilities that are gained as the campaign progresses. These include MRI vision, hacking, brief invincibility, and later telekinesis. Weird.

  The next cutscene shows off Goldfinger's new weapon, the OMEN, which destroys organic matter and disintegrates dudes. Dr. No and his forces discover it's being held at Goldfinger's secret arctic hideout and attack it. And so the second level tasks you with defending the arctic base, and it's not all that great a level. It's a boring arrangement of dull rooms and hallways. The only real highlights are (1) the level's traps that you can activate and (2) the appearance of the laser from the movie Goldfinger (too bad you can't use that as a trap!). Anyways, the base is wrecked but the OMEN is shepherded away. GoldenEye is picked up by Pussy Galore who, by the way, looks and sounds almost nothing like she did in the film. Here she's basically your chauffeur... in a pink helicopter. Remember that from Goldfinger? I don't.

  The next mission takes place in Hong Kong where GoldenEye is tasked with assassinating Dr. No. Spoiler alert: it doesn't work. With an objective like this they could've mixed things up a bit with a sniping mission or stealth gameplay. But no, the majority of this level is shooty-shooty bang-bang inside and above dozens of high rise buildings. Hong Kong may be a bit more colourful than the previous level, bit it's just as mind-numbingly boring. Not only is this the most tedious level yet, but it's also far longer than it has any right to be! It just goes on and on and on and on. The idea is that you've got to go to a specific rooftop for Pussy to pick you up from, but why does the building she picked have to be on the other side of town? Any old freakin' rooftop will do!

  Once that nightmare is over, you head over to Las Vegas where you've got to defend the OMEN in its casino hideout from Xenia Onatopp who is rumoured to be working for Dr. No. This level is only slightly less dull than the previous ones. The gameplay is unchanged but I'll give it credit for being the most visually interesting level in Rogue Agent. The places here look vibrant and alive. If only the other elements of the game were like that!

  It's not until the following level where we actually get to go toe-to-toe (or is that thigh-to-thigh?) against Xenia Onatopp in a boss fight atop Hoover Dam. The only problem is that it comes after about an hour of the worst level in the game: an unending series of similar, lifeless, grey, concrete rooms with generic enemies. (By the way, all the bad guys bleed bright blue blood. I guess it was to avoid an M rating?) You start the level at the bottom of one side of the dam, you go inside, fight your way to the top, cross it halfway whilst taking on dozens of tanks and helicopters, go back down to the bottom of the dam, retrieve the seismic bomb (your mission objective), climb back to the top again, and cross the other half. It is a brainless chore. This game is in serious need of some variety. Other Bond games had vehicle sections, turret sections, stealth sections, even on-rails sections. But in this level I was so fed up I found myself simply running past enemies in order to get to the end quicker.

  There's also a cutscene in which Oddjob betrays GoldenEye, but the rogue agent throws the henchman down a bottomless shaft. And that's the last we see of Oddjob. Why did he betray GoldenEye? Was he really working for Dr. No? Did Goldfinger order him to do it? Seriously, the game never explains it and it's never mentioned again. What a waste of a cool character! By this point I had stopped caring. The only thing motivating me to continue was to see what would happen to the characters and what movie references would be made next. If I weren't a 007 fan this game would've been in the garbage by now.

That's all I can take for now. Check in next week for part 2!